A Poem: Love's Sweet Melody

My love, my sweet, my melody,
Won't you please come away with me.
Stay with me, pray with me;
Be with me forever more.

A chorus of tears divides us, unites us.
Unties all those deceptions,
Those lies we did believe.
It was He who came to deceive.

He won or so it was,
Then came the blood.
Our Grace, our Victory,
humbled we on our knees.

My love, my sweet, my melody,
Won't you please come away with me.
Stay with me, pray with me;
Be with me forever more.

Evangelization Fatigue

This is something I'm seeing many people affected by, and I myself have experienced it. It's when you're speaking with someone about the Faith and it just goes on and on seemingly without end. Explaining the Faith, especially to unwilling ears, can be quite an exhausting feat if your are in it for a lengthy period of time.

As a result of  the exhausting toll, I have noticed Christians are becoming less likely to engage potential converts in the long run. It almost seems as though they give their best evidences in one shot and if the person on the other end isn't instantly convicted and converted they move on. It's understandable in the convenience culture we now live in that this lack of patience exists. We each need to retreat and ask ourselves if we really believe that Jesus Christ is God, Lord, and Saviour. We need to be willing to deny ourselves, pick up our cross and follow Him (Matthew 16:24). If we really believe such things -if we really love the Lord with all our mind, all our soul, and all of our strength (Luke 10:27)- we should be willing to engage with people for the long haul.

I remember well my first experience with evangelization fatigue. You can actually find and read remnants of it here on the YouTube video, "Larry King Live: Creflo Dollar," on Page 2 and Page 3. It's actually a very lengthy exchange and you might have a bit trouble navigating all the different posts. This occurred over the course of a couple if weeks if you can believe that, and resulted in one of most intimate experiences with the Holy Spirit I have had. I came under attack from demons towards the end, and heard the Lord speak to me audibly twice.

The first thing He said to me was when I was avoiding revealing that I was Catholic to the fella because I really didn't want to get into that and thought I would lose my advantage. He said, "Why are you ashamed of Me?" The second time He spoke was later that same night when I saw a physical demon standing ominously on my right as I went to bed and I was getting faint with fear. He said, "I Am ... the Lord," and instantly I felt His peace within me. Such a warm, loving peace it is.

My friends, what St. Paul said to the Ephesians is very true and we need to keep this in mind as we spread the Gospel to all the nations. "For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood; but against principalities and power, against the rulers of the world of this darkness, against the spirits of wickedness in the high places." (Ephesians 6:12) If you haven't already done so, I definitely recommend you familiarise yourself with the sixth  chapter of Ephesians as it is very vital.

The reason I mention it, is because I learned as much during this whole battle. I was exhausted. Beyond exhausted. There came a point where I struggled even to get back on the computer, let alone YouTube and see the inevitable responses. I didn't want to talk any longer and I wanted it all to end. Then one evening in the midst of this, the Holy Spirit spoke to my spirit saying to pray the rosary. "Each time pray the rosary." And so I began to pray one decade of the Rosary before I would respond, and another decade of the Rosary after I had responded. I would even pray a decade before reading the responses too after a while. It helped. It helped tremendously. I began to see that I had become possessive during these exchanges and was seeing it as my own doing, when really it was the Lord's work and not my own. I had no claim in it. So little by little I began to offer more and more of it to the Lord and trusting Him instead of my own ability. I was once weary and heavy burdened, but in His patience and mercy the Lord showed me how to come to Him and find rest. And the new yoke He gave me was light and sweet indeed. (Matthew 11:28-29)

Needless to say this entire event was a game changer for me. Now the work is easy as it truly is His work. I'm just a brush in the hand of the artist as St. Josemaria Escriva would say, to paraphrase. I don't need to pray so intently, as I pray much now naturally. I know the signs when I start getting caught up in the battle, and get right back into praying a decade before and after just as the Lord taught me.

I believe I've mentioned this elsewhere on the blog, but one of my biggest vices is intellectual pride. That's part of the reason I've taken St. Rose of Lima as my patron Saint because I need all the help I can get. How do I combat this? Well, in addition to the importance of prayer and rendering unto God what is God's above, I use Scripture. I read the books of Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Wisdom, and Sirach a lot to remind myself that as much as I think I know, I know nothing. One of my favourite set of verses is from Sirach, "The beginning of human pride is to forsake the Lord;the heart has withdrawn from its Maker. For the beginning of pride is sin, and the one who clings to it pours out abominations." (Sirach 10:12-13) I also enjoy reading the book of Job in order to put myself in my rightful place as a mere creature and specifically enjoy reading Job chapters 38-41. You must guard yourself, striving always to listen and follow our Lord Jesus Christ.

Play By Play: My Thoughts on The Boston Marathon Bombings

The following are my thoughts and theories regarding the Boston Marathon Bombings. They will be up dated periodically, so be sure to check back.

2:13am EST April 19, 2013
My earlier suspicions appear to have been confirmed in these last several hours. First, that it was a domestic threat -not related to any international terror groups. Secondly, I made a claim earlier that there would be communication within the week. It sounds like the unknown subjects were recognised on campus, authorities were contacted, and eventually they escaped in a stolen vehicle.

3:08am EST April 17, 2013
I just wanted to address this notion of there being a Saudi national in custody for anyone who still believes that. This was actually falsely reported by the New York Post, but not before it was picked up by both Fox News and many alternative news outlets (1,2). It was confirmed that there was no one in custody nor any persons of interest, period. As of posting this there are still no suspects.

12:16am EST April 17, 2013 
Oh and there seems to be an emphasis on the word "drill" by certain people. That's just an ordinary word that was used correctly. Look at it this way, a fire drill is still a fire drill even when there is a fire.

12:00am EST April 17, 2013 
 It has been procedure for the bomb sniffing dogs to be present most especially since 9/11 -and they have been at every Boston Marathon since then. It's also common for bomb squad to be present for all major events such as the Superbowl, the Olympics, etc. However, they can really only sweep before the event (which they did for BM) since the dogs are useless in that open public place with lots of people and smells which is why despite being present at the finish line the dogs did not pick up the bomb. Also the bomb itself seems to have consisted of ball bearings and gun powder -so not C4 or other specific bomb material/scent.

So, the presence of the bomb sniffing dogs is nothing out of the ordinary.

10:03pm EST April 16, 2013
Also, I do not believe the suspicious letter sent to a Senator in Mississippi is related. It's highly unusual for a violent offender to change their mode of operation, though it does happen, and a poisoned envelope is a very dramatic change from a bomb. So, if the letter had malicious intent it would be separate and independent from the event in Boston. Such a person may have been planning it for some time and simply saw an opportunity to hide their own actions with the bombings in Boston.

10:00pm EST April 16, 2013
New thoughts. Given that the FBI has said the person in question would likely have spoken about his plans, this tells me a few things. First, it is more evidence that this is a serial bomber as I had originally suspected. Second, it speaks to the motive or personality of this unknown subject. Namely that he may have been a braggart which means this could have been revenge. It's a show of power and control. It does mean that someone probably does know this guy, but it also means an increased likelihood that he'll strike again. That he may become more brazen should he think he winning.

9:50pm EST April 15, 2013
Related to Twitter: A lot of people are retweeting a random picture of a little girl saying that she had died (and often) that she was running on behalf of the Sandy Hook shooting victims. Neither are true and state authorities confirmed the 8 year old that died was actually a boy.

9:44pm EST April 15, 2013
Apparently, none of the departments/agencies had any warning, which is a bit unusual. It may make the perpetrator(s) harder to track. The explosions are his initial communication and it is possible that the media may impact his next step of "communication." If he is still out there, of course -and it certainly sounds like he is.

7:08pm EST April 15, 2013
Update: When I said terrorism below, I was addressing reports of a Saudi national being arrested which was later pulled as they were false. To clarify, I don't believe this has anything to do with Islamic sects or that the threat is outside the US. If organised it would be some sort of a militia, but I doubt it being organised.

6:18pm EST April 15, 2013
So apparently it's a state holiday today in MA, "Patriot's Day" This may or may not have been a factor. If we're still going on the basis of serial bomber, this could be anything from an attack against authority to a statement that America no longer represents what it once did. Or again, this could be related to large numbers of people showing support and celebrating -something he feels he never had or something. And yes, bombers are typically male.

6:00pm EST April 15, 2013
Considering it was several explosions and the way it was set up, I'm think this isn't terrorism. I'm thinking serial bomber. I wonder what his cause is - since you never blow stuff up for the sake of blowing stuff up. I don't think he hates the Boston marathon, but he might resent large numbers of people celebrating for some reason.

Lyric 2.0

I don't want to play this game any more
I'm tired of being so right, yet so wrong
Please just hear what I have to say
Before I go away

You're broken and bruised
Abandoned, so abused
The past keeps trying to drown you
And you don't seem to give a damn

I can never tell if you mean it
You know you really hurt me so
I'm just trying to love the hurt away
So why can't you let it go

Cause Freedom has set you free
The battle, it is done
Don't you see what you did to me
And I did it all for you

Breathe in and lay down your burden
Come and rest a little while
Forgiveness is not your poison
Those tears can finally fall

Improving Government Food Guides

March is nutrition awareness month at Foothills Medical Centre, a place I have been visiting a lot lately. Any information sheets I have received I have gone through and made corrections - specifically to any nutritional information. Instead of doing the same with the food guide I picked up, I thought it would do better to write a post about how their approach to health and nutrition is wrong and therefore the information is wrong too.

The following is based on Canada's Food Guide unless otherwise stated.

Despite being updated, the general approach is the same. The focus is on how fat is bad, and how you need "x" number of servings from the four basic food groups. This is wrong. Why? The information provided simply isn't useful. It doesn't inspire change. I honestly do not care if I am getting servings of this or that because it seems arbitrary and more of a hassle. It is said that these things promote health. How do they promote health? What about them makes me healthy. It is like I am being told the punch line of a joke without any real background. These servings of these groups are important, but why? "They promote health," you may reply. "That's nice, but why?" I retort.

Well, how about this - how about we tell them what is in these various foods in their respective groups that actually promote good health? Why not tell the people about B6, vitamin D, folic acid, and phytonutrients. How about instead of associating a different food group with a colour we associate colour with the different colours of various foods and how it corresponds with the nutrition of that specific food. Canada\s Food Guide does touch on this briefly when it states, "Eat at least one dark green and one orange vegetable a day." However, it doesn't actually inform you as to why these colours are important. In actuality, you should be consuming at least one serving of each colour in the rainbow as it corresponds to a fruit and vegetable. Certain colours have nutrients that other colours do not have so in order to get all of the various nutrients and minerals it is good to cover all the colours. For example, dark green and orange fruits/vegetables have beta carotene in them which is good for ensuring you can see. Red grapes -which are technically purple- have resveratrol in them which prevents cancer, dementia, among other things. If you tell the story, the whole story, about these foods then the people will be more likely to be healthy. Perhaps you may think that simple is the way to go and you can go that way if you wish. However, so long as you insist that people are incapable of making their own choices they will continue to be just that.

You may think that constantly being told how bad fat is, is a good idea because most people on a Western diet are overweight or obese, but it really isn't. I advise against a focus on fat period and instead favour telling the story about food. Focusing on the story about those foods which promote health will put the focus on these and consumption of these will likewise increase. As the people eat more good foods now emboldened about the stories behind them, their cravings and desires for fat will decrease. Their behaviour will change to avoid bad fats with consciously deciding to avoid fat. This further prevents the desire of wanting something because you cannot have it. Further, Alberta Health Services does not even have their fat facts right. They cite non- hydrogenated margarine as a healthy option while stating butter and coconut oil are not healthy. The opposite is true in fact. While butter is by no means a health food the human body is better adapted to breaking it down than it is the chemical product that is margarine.

The other thing that is errant is Vitamin D. Canada's Food Guide recommends that all persons over the age of 50 take a supplement of Vitamin D of 400 IUs. There are a few problems with this. First of all, 400 IUs is such an insignificant amount that to your body it is essentially as though you are not even taking a supplement. Studies suggest that one actually needs to supplement between 5000IUs to 10 000IUs before you actually see any benefit to supplementation. Secondly, unless you are outside in direct sunlight for 30 minutes to an hour without wearing sunblock you are not naturally getting enough Vitamin D regardless of age. Thus, a society that spends most of its time inside most certainly needs to supplement Vitamin D. Elsewhere, Canada's Food Guide recommends drinking two glasses of milk per day in order to get your daily dose of Vitamin D. Most milk and alternatives are fortified with Vitamin D so it is like you are pouring your daily supplement into your milk. I recommend against this. Unless it is raw and whole milk, a regular glass of milk only has about the nutrition of a slice of cake and that is being generous. It is basically just empty calories with a high fat and sugar content even if you're drinking skim milk. Would you eat two slices of cake each day and claim it to be healthy? It is actually healthier to supplement Vitamin D on your own then to consume processed goods which often are so high in sodium, preservatives, and fat that it is really not worth it.

I'm Not An Optimist

I've been told by many that I'm always optimistic or positive. It certainly understand this perspective. Personally, however, I consider myself as being more of a, "hopeful realist."

I do not deceive myself of reality by convincing myself of better things. Things which are not necessarily there. Rather I see the evil thereof and permit it to touch me, but only for a moment. I do not allow it to control me, as that is both reckless and illogical. Getting all bummed out, defeated, and discouraged are simply not useful or productive and so I seldom partake. Being human of course, sometimes it just gets to be too much and I, like anyone else, seek out lighter fare.

I do acknowledge that there is often a silver lining in life's troubles and trials because it is a universal truth, not merely positive fiction. The not so good is a plain to me as the good is. It is the good though which often possesses the most value and so it makes sense to take this instead of letting the not good cover me up as the walls close in.

It is neither positive nor optimistic, but rather the most logical thing to do. As well, there is hope. Hope is not at all like wishful thinking. Wishful thinking desires that which is unlikely and impossible. Hope, however, is logical. It sees the writing on the wall and perceives what could very well be. Hope is more like a hypothesis, drawn up only after knowledge. Thus, hope is informed by knowledge what the senses do not yet perceive. For we are saved by hope. But hope that is seen, is not hope. For what a man seeth, why doth he hope for?  But if we hope for that which we see not, we wait for it with patience. (Romans 8:24-25)

The good and bad of the past seems to foreshadow the possibilities of the future. So then I can realistically hope, even though I have not yet seen such things.

Evil and God

I originally wrote this on Thursday, December 13, 2012, which many of us know is the day before that fateful shooting in Newtown, Connecticut. Needless to say, I haven't really been up to posting a new blog post, especially given this topic. However, after listening to Robbie Parker, loving father of Emilie Parker, I  feel like it is going to be okay. So, without further adieu here is the blog post I had written.

Some people look at the evil in the world and proclaim there is no God. I look at the evil in the world and see clearly that there is a God, there must be. For there can be no evil without good, for if there is no good how can we identify something as being evil?

Good is to evil as light is to darkness, for darkness is as light. It's interesting that the Bible (Genesis 1:3-5; Psalm 139:12) would state this because it is actually scientific fact. In truth there is no such thing as darkness - that's just a word we use to describe an absence of light. So what is evil? Evil is simply an absence of good. What then is good? Only God is Good.

How then can evil be the absence of God, if I may, if God is omnipresent? That seems to be a contradiction of terms. He is always with us, always (Psalm 23:4; Matthew 28:20). When one sins - be it a lie or to commit some great atrocity such as genocide - one sort of opts out of loving God. He is still there, and it is precisely that he loves you that he will not contravene your freewill and instead permits you to sin. After all, love not freely given, is not love at all.

Now not contravening your free will is not to say He condones sin, certainly not. In fact, He does all that He can to dissuade us from our sins. He sends us all kinds of graces, people, and circumstances into our lives to convince us otherwise - but, as we can freely choose good and evil, it is up to us to pay attention and choose to agree with Him and not sin. So when there is sin, it is on us, not God. He does everything except removing freewill - which would be contrary to love - and if we reject Him, then we justly deserve the consequence of sin.

What is the ultimate consequence of sin? He removes Himself from us. He loves us, and so when we tell him by our sins that we do not want Him He gives us precisely what we want (Romans 1:26). However, it is as though He is right there in front of you that if you would only stretch out your arm you could touch Him. It is in this way that He is both removed when we sin, and yet still very present.

When we choose sin, it is like loving someone - truly loving them - and yet they cheat on you time and time again. They resist you and they resist all reason to the point that their reason itself becomes corrupted. Yet they continue to go on and on, and you just keep keeping on because you love them. You do this in the hope that they will one day be faithful and choose to love you as well. That distant prodigal day is why it is worth the while. This is what we are to God when we choose sin, when we choose evil.

This is why evil is truly evil - because it is willed and chosen freely in the contrary to God. That's what really gets it when some human tragedy unfolds. It's not so much that evil has happened -rather, it is that someone actually chose to do evil. This is what cries out to the heavens.