I've often thought about people such as who they are, where they come from and where they are going. Over time I've become more specific, focusing on the different ages and ethnicities of people and imagining, if for a moment, what their story is. As a young, single woman it was inevitable that I would eventually come to think about men and relationships.
One can certainly learn a lot through observation, and one learns to do so subtly when this includes the observation of other persons. If you observe enough people, long enough, similarities start to stand out. Eventually, you wish you could stop a woman from nagging her husband because unlike her, you see clearly that he didn't intend to offend her by what he said. In fact, though my observations I have learned that the majority of relational issues stem from communication or rather, a lack thereof. It's heartbreaking when she turns away from her barrage on him, you can see how badly he just wants to reach out and comfort her and tell her how much he's sorry for not being the man she deserved. He holds back, believing that she'd never believe him or perhaps the ache in his own heart is just too immense. On the other hand, you'd be amazed how often couples, even ones married for thirty years will steal looks at their love when that love isn't looking. These things are both the good and the bad, are common amongst all.
The observations take more depth when you observe the interaction of friends and family. Often, one or the other will tell you their perspective on what's going on. More often than not I've had both offending parties share their perspectives unbeknownst to the other which makes for quite the balencing act while still leaving many blanks left unfilled. Humans are strange creatures when it comes to communication. For starters, the genders each have their own specific style of communication which is a fact which unfortunately so many haven't a clue about. Those that do know, often have a hard time attempting to apply such knowledge in their communications.
Women seldomly speak even a word that does not have a double meaning. In fact, the way one must understand the feminine tongue is actually quite similar to how one is to read and interpret the Holy Scriptures (Bible). When one is reading the Bible, amongst many other things, one must be aware that there is both a literal meaning to the text and there is a spirtual meaning to the text. For example, John 1:1 says, "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." In the literal sense, it is saying that in the beginning was Jesus, and Jesus was with God, and Jesus was God. With spiritual eyes we find that this is how Genesis 1:1 began and it's describing the new creation, the new Adam - that is, Jesus Christ is the new Adam. How then doth the woman speaketh? Let's say for example that you and the woman got into a fight and you said she simply shouldn't speak at all anymore and later you discovered on Facebook that she'd made a status about how it's important to speak with sweet words and how saying, "I know," invalidates people. Literally, she is saying that it is important to say sweet words and that saying, "I know," when someone shares something they've discovered with you invalidates them. The second meaning, is that the status is directed specifically at you and the whole, "I know," thing is just to throw you off. She is trying to subtly have the last word unaware that men and nearly incapable of picking up subtle pieces of communication. Why?
Men have a different communication style, that's why. Men say what they mean and mean what they say, they speak plainly. He will here what she says but not read between the lines to get what she's really saying. Certainly, I know of lads that make a great effort and train themselves to read between the lines and these are brave and dedicated men to pick up such a difficult language. A woman on the other hand will naturally assume that there is more to what a man says, some sort of hidden meaning to his words. This often results in her coming up with a positive meaning and a negative meaning of which she usually selects the negative meaning as the ones intended. Little does she realise, if such occurs, the man always intends the positive meaning. Men gripe about why women just can't say what they mean, erroneously thinking that this would be an easier course of action. As a woman, it takes great effort to say what I mean. I generally only speak plainly to a lad with whom I know makes an effort to attain the feminine tongue and I tell him that.
There is a lot more that I could say on this subject and I will, just in later posts.
In the meantime, take care, God bless and good luck trying to apply your new found knowledge!